A new chapter has opened up in our lives. Our home has been sold and we are "right-sizing" to a beautiful condo. I'll be sad to leave this place, our home for the longest time in our marriage. We've had new grand-children brought home from the hospital to live with us, our son and his wife planned their destination wedding from these rooms and we have been blessed to have lots of great friends and family gatherings here.
The greatest joy was to have my couples meet me in my home office. I created a beautiful, peaceful sanctuary in one of our rooms. I think I enjoy meeting the couples when they are in their jeans, relaxed. They open up about their engagement, how they met and what they love about each other. We have one or two meetings, depending on the time we have to plan. I give them ideas for readings from my files after I get the "flavor" of their ceremony. I have pictures of weddings I've done around the room, some beautiful sacred items and a cozy couch for them to sit on.
When its impossible for them to come to me, I meet couples at places that are convenient to them: Starbucks, Paneras, diners or even a park bench will do. I've been into the City to have dinner with some of my brides and grooms, grooms and grooms and brides and brides! It's a joy!
I'll remember the wedding we had in our backyard, another in the dining room and a pronouncement in the living room of our home. We asked a friend to come with us from the diner to witness a late night wedding last year. Wherever you gather, I'm available and ready to watch you elope to a new marital status!
Saturday, May 7, 2016
Sunday, January 24, 2016
Sweet 16
It's been a while since I connected with my Blogger spot. I am busy with material for my monthly column in The Great South Bay Magazine, weddings for some wonderful couples and taking some time to write for my own - almost ready - book of meditations.
Writing can take a fair amount of my creative energy. When you don't have the inspiration, it's a struggle to sit at the computer and make the fingers move. I have a lot of time on my hands now, in Florida for a few months, and want to get this project done! I've had so much going on: shoulder surgery, officiating a nieces wedding, packing for the winter and then got hit with the flu. It takes me some time to recharge enough to be able to sit and feel the flow of creative energy.
I found that meditation has been a huge help to spark that flow. Sitting and just be-ing has been a daily regime that I maintain. It's been a way to reconnect to the Divine inside and also quell the machinations of my mind. A friend calls them "the ooga-boogas". I make sure they are gone by the time I arise from my meditation chair and don't think about them for the rest of the day.
Meditation can be a five minute eye-rest or an hour full body scan. I can meditate anywhere, anytime and among any group. My sister, Stancie, used to be famous for her power naps. They recharged her, too. I also remember coming home from school and finding my mom stretched out on her loveseat to recharge for us kids. Whether they were out cold for 30 minutes, or meditating on the peace and quiet, I take that as permission to have myself a lie-down when I need it.
So, the discipline involved in writing starts with my quiet time. Since the book is on meditation, I get a boat load of material while I'm sitting. I love it, anyway.
Let's start off Sweet 16 with some sweet quiet and rest - if only for 5 minutes. It will send up all the love to the universe and heal yourself and the world.
Writing can take a fair amount of my creative energy. When you don't have the inspiration, it's a struggle to sit at the computer and make the fingers move. I have a lot of time on my hands now, in Florida for a few months, and want to get this project done! I've had so much going on: shoulder surgery, officiating a nieces wedding, packing for the winter and then got hit with the flu. It takes me some time to recharge enough to be able to sit and feel the flow of creative energy.
I found that meditation has been a huge help to spark that flow. Sitting and just be-ing has been a daily regime that I maintain. It's been a way to reconnect to the Divine inside and also quell the machinations of my mind. A friend calls them "the ooga-boogas". I make sure they are gone by the time I arise from my meditation chair and don't think about them for the rest of the day.
Meditation can be a five minute eye-rest or an hour full body scan. I can meditate anywhere, anytime and among any group. My sister, Stancie, used to be famous for her power naps. They recharged her, too. I also remember coming home from school and finding my mom stretched out on her loveseat to recharge for us kids. Whether they were out cold for 30 minutes, or meditating on the peace and quiet, I take that as permission to have myself a lie-down when I need it.
So, the discipline involved in writing starts with my quiet time. Since the book is on meditation, I get a boat load of material while I'm sitting. I love it, anyway.
Let's start off Sweet 16 with some sweet quiet and rest - if only for 5 minutes. It will send up all the love to the universe and heal yourself and the world.
Thursday, October 9, 2014
Fall meanderings
This has been a blur of a season. If I didn't have a calendar, I would have sworn September didn't happen at all.
I had about 8 weddings since September 1st and that included two last minute elopements this very week. There just happens to be a Blood Red moon and if that has anything to do with this, bring on more of them!
Life is strange, with it's twists and turns. We don't know what each day will bring, but it would be nice to have a heads up once in a while. I make plans, then God laughs and turns the day all around. I am pretty flexible and try to live in the moment. My friend, Barbara and I, went on a workshop a few years ago at Omega given by Jon Kabat-Zin. We were taught what most Buddhists do to keep the focus on the moment. Eat with purpose, walk gently and slowly across the earth, wash dishes and relish the clean water and suds and mind your mind!
Mindfulness is a wonderful thing to remember to do. I know I am off when I race from one venue to the other, catching up with the couples who need me to be at a place on time. I breathe as I race, but sometimes, it's too stressful and I have to remember I am human and will be there when I get there.
I do ask them, when I finally get them in front of me at the ceremony, to take a moment to breathe and be present. It helps me, too. I need that pause to be mindful of the enormity of the task, the love in the space and remember that Spirit is ever present.
I had about 8 weddings since September 1st and that included two last minute elopements this very week. There just happens to be a Blood Red moon and if that has anything to do with this, bring on more of them!
Life is strange, with it's twists and turns. We don't know what each day will bring, but it would be nice to have a heads up once in a while. I make plans, then God laughs and turns the day all around. I am pretty flexible and try to live in the moment. My friend, Barbara and I, went on a workshop a few years ago at Omega given by Jon Kabat-Zin. We were taught what most Buddhists do to keep the focus on the moment. Eat with purpose, walk gently and slowly across the earth, wash dishes and relish the clean water and suds and mind your mind!
Mindfulness is a wonderful thing to remember to do. I know I am off when I race from one venue to the other, catching up with the couples who need me to be at a place on time. I breathe as I race, but sometimes, it's too stressful and I have to remember I am human and will be there when I get there.
I do ask them, when I finally get them in front of me at the ceremony, to take a moment to breathe and be present. It helps me, too. I need that pause to be mindful of the enormity of the task, the love in the space and remember that Spirit is ever present.
Wednesday, August 13, 2014
Mountain Wedding
The summer started off with a wimper. All was calm, relaxed and looked like the weather was going to be the three H's for the duration.
Rain made it wonderful to see the grass green up nicely. Hydrangas popped out on time as well as the beautiful trailing mini roses along our fence.
The weekend of July 11-12 was exciting. I was asked to officiate a wedding for the daughter of an old high school buddy of mine. The couple are based in New York City but wanted a different kind of place, something so unique that their guests and family would all love. They love the mountains and found a quarry in Saugerties, New York for the event.
The quarry, called Opus 40, was bought by a man named Harvey Fite in 1938. He was a sculptor who taught at Bard. The quarry was his life's work. He fashioned sculptures with rudimentary tools. A 9 ton pillar, called "Flame" is the first thing you see when you enter the space. Other sculptures are in various places around the property, many fashioned after Mayan ruins in Honduras, where he had worked.
The wedding ceremony was set down into the quarry, with a background of raw bluestone. Rustic benches were set for the guests. The footing to walk down the rocks was unsteady, so flat shoes were a must. The couple had requested their guests to all wear white, which turned out to be a beautiful sea of white amid the black rocks.
As our couple has been in the music business, sound was well thought out and beautiful. The bride and her parents walked down into the quarry to her waiting groom to the song by Elbow "Beautiful Day". After the ceremony, which had the crowd in tears, a bagpiper piped them up and out of the space.
The next day, I drove home to Long Island via Hyde Park and had a long visit with an aunt that I haven't had a relationship with for many years. She was my mother's sister, her only surviving sibling. We had a great talk and she asked me when I was coming back up to visit!
I am reflecting on how, when you take a risk, like going out of town to do a wedding for some special people, or gathering all your courage to give an estranged-relative a hug, that you are given the grace/strength to rise to any occasion. The rewards? I sang all the way home on the NY Thruway!
Rain made it wonderful to see the grass green up nicely. Hydrangas popped out on time as well as the beautiful trailing mini roses along our fence.
The weekend of July 11-12 was exciting. I was asked to officiate a wedding for the daughter of an old high school buddy of mine. The couple are based in New York City but wanted a different kind of place, something so unique that their guests and family would all love. They love the mountains and found a quarry in Saugerties, New York for the event.
The quarry, called Opus 40, was bought by a man named Harvey Fite in 1938. He was a sculptor who taught at Bard. The quarry was his life's work. He fashioned sculptures with rudimentary tools. A 9 ton pillar, called "Flame" is the first thing you see when you enter the space. Other sculptures are in various places around the property, many fashioned after Mayan ruins in Honduras, where he had worked.
The wedding ceremony was set down into the quarry, with a background of raw bluestone. Rustic benches were set for the guests. The footing to walk down the rocks was unsteady, so flat shoes were a must. The couple had requested their guests to all wear white, which turned out to be a beautiful sea of white amid the black rocks.
As our couple has been in the music business, sound was well thought out and beautiful. The bride and her parents walked down into the quarry to her waiting groom to the song by Elbow "Beautiful Day". After the ceremony, which had the crowd in tears, a bagpiper piped them up and out of the space.
The next day, I drove home to Long Island via Hyde Park and had a long visit with an aunt that I haven't had a relationship with for many years. She was my mother's sister, her only surviving sibling. We had a great talk and she asked me when I was coming back up to visit!
I am reflecting on how, when you take a risk, like going out of town to do a wedding for some special people, or gathering all your courage to give an estranged-relative a hug, that you are given the grace/strength to rise to any occasion. The rewards? I sang all the way home on the NY Thruway!
Saturday, December 28, 2013
BLESSED
Winding down the days till the end of another year. How have you spent this year? Did you anticipate the end with great gladness? Did it have its tough parts? Were the good times great!? Did you love someone or something passionately this year? Did you know Spirit within just a little bit better this year?
We all have questions about life. How does the beautiful machine of our body work? How does the heart keep beating and blood continue to pulse throughout the whole body in such homeostasis?
Will there be a place after this when we are all together as one? When will there be peace on this planet?
I think about the ones that have gone before me at this time of year. Not without sadness but not in a maudlin way, either. I have faith that we will all see each other again, in some form or another. They have transcended this mortal world and their spirits are still quite active in my life and the lives around that they left behind. I am so sure of that.
We watch old movies and slides each Christmas Day. This year, I didn't need to reminisce about the ones that passed. I have them in my heart. I carry them always. I call this ritual "watching movies of dead relatives". Pretty cold, but that is how it seems like to me. I also think it's a way to avoid communicating how we really feel. If we could just turn off the video and talk. Talk and laugh and cry, if necessary. I'll suggest it---let's see how it flies.
So this December, as we call it a wrap I suggest that we talk to each other. Don't let anything be left unsaid. Say "I love you" a lot. Say "Your presence means something to me". Make this year count for something. Forgive a hurt. Make amends for something you feel crummy about. Hold the ones you love closer.
I'm a work in progress. But, I can be better each day with the help of Spirit; with more awareness of the nearness of Spirit in my life and with you all helping me.
Happy New Year, but enjoy each day.
We all have questions about life. How does the beautiful machine of our body work? How does the heart keep beating and blood continue to pulse throughout the whole body in such homeostasis?
Will there be a place after this when we are all together as one? When will there be peace on this planet?
I think about the ones that have gone before me at this time of year. Not without sadness but not in a maudlin way, either. I have faith that we will all see each other again, in some form or another. They have transcended this mortal world and their spirits are still quite active in my life and the lives around that they left behind. I am so sure of that.
We watch old movies and slides each Christmas Day. This year, I didn't need to reminisce about the ones that passed. I have them in my heart. I carry them always. I call this ritual "watching movies of dead relatives". Pretty cold, but that is how it seems like to me. I also think it's a way to avoid communicating how we really feel. If we could just turn off the video and talk. Talk and laugh and cry, if necessary. I'll suggest it---let's see how it flies.
So this December, as we call it a wrap I suggest that we talk to each other. Don't let anything be left unsaid. Say "I love you" a lot. Say "Your presence means something to me". Make this year count for something. Forgive a hurt. Make amends for something you feel crummy about. Hold the ones you love closer.
I'm a work in progress. But, I can be better each day with the help of Spirit; with more awareness of the nearness of Spirit in my life and with you all helping me.
Happy New Year, but enjoy each day.
Saturday, October 19, 2013
R & R
Spent a few restful days on the South Carolina shore last week. It was a wonderful getaway for the two of us after a hectic summer.
I was amazed at the difference in the shoreline. The tide went out so far, we could ride bikes on the hard surface of the ocean floor. The wildlife was sparse at this time of year(Fall) but we enjoyed the sandpipers and gulls along our ride. The ocean was warm enough to swim but the air had a nice chill in it, so I deferred. Shells were tiny! They were few and far between, unlike the west coast of Florida and our Fire Island beaches. I found more shells on the golf course! Yes, multi-tasking is one of my talents. Hit the ball, stoop to look for shells, hit the ball.......
We loved Charleston and the history of the Civil War. The Southern Hospitality was lovely. I was called "ma'am" fifty times! The food was yummy and there was plenty of great spots to dine. I went to The Gibbes Museum to see photographic exhibit from the Civil War. It showed the carnage caused by the muskets; the amount of casualties was almost 1/4 the population of the U.S. at the time. Amazed at the clarity of the photographs and horrified at the site of so many dead and wounded.
The South has its charm, yes. It also has it's dark side: Slavery. I would not bring myself to paying money to go to a southern plantation. One couple in our group did and was astounded to hear the black man who gave the tour say that he was "so proud to have his family work this place for so many years." I am sure that was the written speech that the tourists wanted to hear. Those places were the scene of so much pain and sadness that the earth still holds the cries of women, men and children that were kept there to do the Masters bidding.
It is a nice place to visit, but you won't catch me living there anytime soon. The charm of Charleston may bring me back for some delicious grits and shrimp. Till then, I'm a satisfied New Yorker!
I was amazed at the difference in the shoreline. The tide went out so far, we could ride bikes on the hard surface of the ocean floor. The wildlife was sparse at this time of year(Fall) but we enjoyed the sandpipers and gulls along our ride. The ocean was warm enough to swim but the air had a nice chill in it, so I deferred. Shells were tiny! They were few and far between, unlike the west coast of Florida and our Fire Island beaches. I found more shells on the golf course! Yes, multi-tasking is one of my talents. Hit the ball, stoop to look for shells, hit the ball.......
We loved Charleston and the history of the Civil War. The Southern Hospitality was lovely. I was called "ma'am" fifty times! The food was yummy and there was plenty of great spots to dine. I went to The Gibbes Museum to see photographic exhibit from the Civil War. It showed the carnage caused by the muskets; the amount of casualties was almost 1/4 the population of the U.S. at the time. Amazed at the clarity of the photographs and horrified at the site of so many dead and wounded.
The South has its charm, yes. It also has it's dark side: Slavery. I would not bring myself to paying money to go to a southern plantation. One couple in our group did and was astounded to hear the black man who gave the tour say that he was "so proud to have his family work this place for so many years." I am sure that was the written speech that the tourists wanted to hear. Those places were the scene of so much pain and sadness that the earth still holds the cries of women, men and children that were kept there to do the Masters bidding.
It is a nice place to visit, but you won't catch me living there anytime soon. The charm of Charleston may bring me back for some delicious grits and shrimp. Till then, I'm a satisfied New Yorker!
Monday, October 7, 2013
NOTICING X 2
A fond farewell to our gorgeous summer! But wait--it's October and the thermostat is registering 77 and more each day. The air is crisp in the morning but warms up in mid-day. I'm seeing lots of folks running and on their bikes, enjoying the beautiful Fall here on Long Island.
The birds are eating everything I put out for them in their feeders daily. Do they know that this winter is going to be a doozie? Squirrels are getting fat and the Canada Geese are honking away on the lake. Fall brings on the "diving ducks", skillful in holding their breaths as they pluck up the algae on the bottom. Montauk Daisies abound inbetween the fall mums left over from years back, prolific and hearty despite being neglected. The white daisies pop out and get your attention as if to say--last look at blooming flowers! Catch me while you can!
Noticing the bluest skies and loveliest feathery clouds. I found a cloud-bird flying over a sunrise one morning while going over the bridge to the beach.
On facebook, someone posted a cloud-dog. Seemed impossible but those dog people on facebook can conjure up some interesting pictures!
Noticing that shops are putting out Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas stuff together. The Big Three-how the thought of all of them together gives me anxiety.
Back in Spiritual Counseling class each month. The tourists in New York are dressed like they are at the beach. I'm in my basic Manhattan Black. Noticing that I need to put some color in my wardrobe. Black and Orange?
Noticing as I grow older that I want to google, read, listen and absorb as much as possible. I'm turning into an information junkie. Unfortunately, I remember about half of it!
Noticing that I could go on like this for days, so----DONE!
The birds are eating everything I put out for them in their feeders daily. Do they know that this winter is going to be a doozie? Squirrels are getting fat and the Canada Geese are honking away on the lake. Fall brings on the "diving ducks", skillful in holding their breaths as they pluck up the algae on the bottom. Montauk Daisies abound inbetween the fall mums left over from years back, prolific and hearty despite being neglected. The white daisies pop out and get your attention as if to say--last look at blooming flowers! Catch me while you can!
Noticing the bluest skies and loveliest feathery clouds. I found a cloud-bird flying over a sunrise one morning while going over the bridge to the beach.
On facebook, someone posted a cloud-dog. Seemed impossible but those dog people on facebook can conjure up some interesting pictures!
Noticing that shops are putting out Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas stuff together. The Big Three-how the thought of all of them together gives me anxiety.
Back in Spiritual Counseling class each month. The tourists in New York are dressed like they are at the beach. I'm in my basic Manhattan Black. Noticing that I need to put some color in my wardrobe. Black and Orange?
Noticing as I grow older that I want to google, read, listen and absorb as much as possible. I'm turning into an information junkie. Unfortunately, I remember about half of it!
Noticing that I could go on like this for days, so----DONE!
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